vanessa.oxygenvalve.com

Weekly Tweets from 2009-01-04

Vanessa — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 03:59:59 +0000

Sweet Jesus, it’s finally 3 minutes to 5:00. Longest. Day. Ever. #
My logic in deciding to be at work tomorrow escapes me at the moment. It will be a miracle if I can drag my tired ass out of bed in the AM. #
Dammit! I’m not making any resolutions to stop fuckin’ swearing. #
I have to loosen my belt a notch. That might be a bad way to start off the new year. #
Happy freakin’ new year, bitches! #
Washing the new skivvies. Can’t remember the last time I bought so much underwear… oh yeah, never. #
Is it bad that I can’t drink ANYTHING containing peach schnapps and not think about brain hemorrhages on Halloween? #

On Resolutions

Vanessa — Fri, 02 Jan 2009 21:53:17 +0000

New Years resolutions are for assholes. They are borne out of guilt; guilt over something you did or didn’t do that you would like to improve upon in the coming year. Maybe you’re a gossip, maybe you steal things from work, or maybe you pick your nose in public — whatever. Everyone has room for improvement, and a little healthy guilt over some of these things is a great way to better yourself. Heck, if prizes were given out based on guilt, I’d win the trophy! But what I don’t like about this annual ritual is that the minute you make one, you’ve already set yourself up to fail. Good intentions and temporary enthusiasm give way to old habits, and you’re back where you started: feeling guilty and promising yourself that you’ll do better next time. God, I sound bitter!

Bitterness aside, there are a few things that I will be working on this year and probably years to come. Frankly, I don’t like making promises I can’t keep (and I don’t want to be labeled an asshole), so that’s why I’m not calling them resolutions. First, I’d like to get rid of a lot of stuff I have floating around; useless crap that clutters my home and my mind. It needs to go away. Forever. Next, I’d like to be a more charitable person. I consider myself very lucky for the luxuries that Mike and I can afford, and I’d like to share some of my wealth with those less fortunate. We currently give a little, but we can afford more. Next, I have to be more active. I am a sedentary slug, but I can’t keep that up any longer. I don’t like how flabby I’ve become, but I abhor exercise, so therein lies the problem. Plus, I have hereditary heart disease to worry about. This has been and will be an ongoing struggle. As a dovetail to that, I need to stop making excuses for being lazy. I often find myself procrastinating, even when there are things I’d like to do, such as sewing or reading. So there you have it — my short list of self-improvement; and if I catch you calling them resolutions, I’ll kick you in the kneecaps!

I am pretty sure I won’t be able to accomplish all my goals in a year. But I’m totally OK with that, because I am a work-in-progress, and I refuse to make myself feel terrible for not being perfect. I really believe it’s the approach you make to self-improvement that counts. You can’t just pound your fist on the table and proclaim your intention to lose 20 pounds this year without thinking the whole thing through. What will it take for me to accomplish my goal, and am I willing to make the sacrifices or changes that are needed? If you are willing, then don’t berate yourself if you happen fall short; it happens to the best of us.

Happy New Year! May 2009 bring you peace and contentment — whatever your personal goals may be.

Weekly Tweets from 2008-12-28

Vanessa — Mon, 29 Dec 2008 03:59:59 +0000

Despite feeling like a stuffed pig, I still have room for one more cookie. Must start diet… Next week! #
I don’t have the heart to tell my mom her perfume makes her smell like an old lady. :( Should I tell her? #
Well, I finally did it. I finally tore the ass out of my favorite jeans. Admittedly, they were pretty ratty, and my butt has grown a bit. #
For the two times a year wrap presents, I can’t ever find the damn tape. I probably have 4 rolls hidden in stupid places! #
Feeling a little bah-humbug, and wishing this fucking laundry would do itself. Maybe a cocktail would help. #
Husband is trying to guess his Christmas gift. So far the most elaborate guess: robot jesus santa doll. Santa cracks open to reveal #
Swag from office White Elephant Gift Exchange: A 10-pack of men’s razors. Great! Just the thing to slit my wrists with! #

Weekly Tweets from 2008-12-21

Vanessa — Mon, 22 Dec 2008 03:59:59 +0000

Despite some serious douchebaggery in the part of other drivers, I made it home in one piece. #
Was going to shovel my driveway after work. Decided to go to happy hour instead. #
Making a video of the 5 minute vmail might be a bad idea. After listening to it a second time, I realized I work with that person. OOPSIE! #
Got an awesome message on my work vmail: an accidental 1am call wherein two catty bitches argue with each other for 5 minutes. #
“I generally am a lazy bastard who wants to get the job done as fast as possible just to be able to be lazy again.” — Gert Wiescher #
Somehow I came up with some new and creative ways to injure myself this weekend! #

Weekly Tweets from 2008-12-14

Vanessa — Mon, 15 Dec 2008 03:59:59 +0000

I can’t watch as the contractors move my expensive sideboard curio. Heart. In. Stomach. #
Watching the snow fall outside my office window, and listening to the destruction occurring in my kitchen. #
My cat, George, is painfully clingy when I’m home all day. Dude, I love you, but don’t you have a catnip toy to dool on or something? #
Fell asleep on the couch listening to Christmas music afer dinner and two eggnogs. Never got to decorate the Tree. There’s always tomorrow. #
FTW?? Tell me why my default search engine is google.co.uk! And my browser just tried to correct my spelling of favorite to be favourite. #
This dark, snowy/rainy day calls for some noise-cancelling headphones and a long list of smarmy lounge music! #
Wishing I owned more skirts — as if I need more clothes! :) #
I’m beginning to think that making Christmas cookies on Saturday was maybe a mistake. It’s now Tuesday, and there are only 3 left. #
Lunch will have to wait a while. I have a 12:30 mtg, and I was just looking up photos of thrombosis for a recent project. Who’s hungry? #
Dear Monday, You are no friend of mine! #